Logic, reason and deep psychological problems displayed for your amusement

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

Beautiful Jeff Gets The Sccop

Tired of being just another pretty face in Bloggerville, Jeff over at Beautiful Atrocities doffed his PJs and got all investigative on Lucy Ramirez's ass...

So I flew to fricking Houston & met my friend Suki from Splendora, who said I was nuts. "Look, I know the broad's name," I said. "A source told me she's in the poultry business.Vamos!" We began hitting the poultry farms, posing as Church's Fried Chicken scouts with some IDs we'd forged at Kinkos. After 9 or 10 of these pit toilets, my eyes swelled shut & I was coughing feather balls. And I hate chickens; they can smell fear.

We found the little Bush-hating bitch at the Motorhead Poultryworks & Gift Shoppe where they said she ran the gut-sucker or something. We cornered her in the breakroom. She was a Section 8 blonde in a white smock, combing her eyelashes with a toothpick & eating a jumbo box of Hooters Hot Pot BBQ Chicken Wings

Congratulations to Jeff for teh big story, now get right over there and read the whole action-packed, exciting and ultimately life affirming tale.


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